Aquarius Horoscope 20.1.15

Horrorscopes AquariusThe 20th of January sees the end of Capricorn and the start of Aquarius, the Jug.

20 January—18 February
Chef rating: 4/10 (higher for fans of food chemistry & physics)
Favourite foods: created by 3D printer and/or cooled with liquid nitrogen

If you are a Jug
You have a certain scientific interest in food but no emotional attachment (a bit like your human relationships). Your capacity for research, combined with your creativity, would make you a good chef, if only you cared — but you don’t. If you do end up in a kitchen, you are the star sign most likely to Go Heston. You are a good eater, willing for the sake of scientific investigation to try new things and clean your plate, but it is very much to gain knowledge rather than any deep love of eating. Accept that other star signs like long mealtimes and boring foodstuffs. It’s not all bad – you can use the time to study their socialising patterns.

If you know a Jug
Jugs are as loony about food as they are about everything else. Basically you are Watson to their demented Sherlock. If you let them in the kitchen, prepare for some startling creations. Force some nutrients into them by insisting on a daily eating routine, but vary the dishes — remember that curiosity will lead them to try most new things. NB If you go camping with a Jug, ensure you are the one packing supplies. The average Jug would work out how many calories everyone needs and bring along the requisite allowance of Kendal mint cake. And nothing else. And be genuinely puzzled and hurt by the reaction.

Click here for discussions of Aries and Pisces in the kitchen. Check back on April 20, when we’ll be covering Taurus.

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